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I worry the same way about people with babies. Aaron and I most likely will never have them, or won't have one for at least 10 years, at which point a huge gap will have been produced between us (baby-less) and them (baby-full).


I was really hesitant to try to get involved in Austin for exactly the same reason. Plus with all of the shower and wedding gifts, I can't afford to keep making friends with single people! And yet, I also have nothing to contribute to conversations about babies, except a general desire not to have any for the foreseeable future.

Emily Ann

Come to back to NY and we'll spend an evening at Ginger with some handsome, hilarious and single men. Bet the thought of that gap will close quite quickly. PS I feel the same way you do and it is hard but at the same time, I try not to think about it b/c worrying about it only drives me crazier. And we all know how crazy I am.


Ahhhhh friend...this post saddened me. You and I have had multiple conversations about this and now I feel evil because I'm on the other side. Believe me when I say this, the grass is not greener. It's still lonely. I really hope you know that you can always talk to me about this stuff. I don't want that to change. You ARE my mexican sister!


I have been reading for a while, but I think this is the first time I have commented. I completely understand the "friend cleansing" period. I am 29 and have been going through one of my own for the past 3 years. The best insight I can give... flow with it. It is so much better if you spend the most energy on those that give you back the best energy :)


I can empathize, honestly. It's a lonely time. But I think you are describing a natural growing-up process. We spend our first 22 years or so surrounded by people our own age, and we tend to have a large "posse" all through school, then we tend to hang onto that concept in our twenties.

As tough as it is, it's natural to lose that "posse," keeping touch with the closest soul-friends, and begin to develop a smaller, but much more diverse, circle of friends. Will you find a group of five or ten or twelve girlfriends to party with? Probably not. but you might be surprised to find a younger friend with whom you love shopping, and an older friend with whom you enjoy long conversations and laughter, and a traveling companion or two, and a couple of people to drink beer and watch football with, etc.

Yes, it feels lonely right now, but eventually you should feel freer and stronger...and able to do things because you want to, and not have your life hinge on whether or not a certain number of your buddies will do it with you.

God, I sound like I'm trying to be The Wise One on the Mountain Top! Sorry about that...I'm really not. But I do believe that even your married and reproducing friends will eventually have to go through this, as their other married friends grow and change in different directions, and as their children grow up. We all have to eventually stop living in a pack and grow into who we are.

Please forgive my lengthy post, and feel free to delete, if it's too long!!


Erk...I mean I'm really not trying to be The Wise One on the Mountain Top! When I re-read it, it sounded like I was saying I wasn't really sorry!


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