Everything I say is fascinating.

Vegas in Pictures (which just means filler)

My Friend the Unknowing Celebrity Stalker

So I took a little vacation and I forgot to tell you. Sorry about that! I will tell you all about it in another post. How mysterious of me! Keeping everyone on the edge of their seats like I'm SOMEBODY! 

Anyway this post is all about my friend Emily Ann, who I never actually call Emily Ann, but she signs all her comments that way so therefore when I write about her on this blog that is how I address her. It feels so formal to call her by this especially when I usually leave voicemails on her phone it goes like this, "Hey fart bag call me back!" Yes we are middle school boys. 

Emily lives in New York and sees celebrities a lot but she knows the code and doesn't bother them, but once she is out of ear shot she calls me to tell me all about it because it is usually something hilarious. Just last week my phone rang, but I was on the other line and couldn't get to it and when I called her back the first words out of her mouth were I just ran into Josh Duhamel like body to body!  If I can remember the story correctly she was looking for her wallet or her phone when she was walking down the street and she ran into someone and she immediately looked up and said oh i'm so sorry and looked right into the face of Josh. (I feel I can call him Josh because we are obviously so close! I mean he practically grinded with my friend on public street.) Emily said he looked really tan almost orange and that they must be filming something because that is when she noticed all the trailers everywhere. I must say that is so Emily she will be lost in her own world and then look up and be OH HEY THEY ARE FILMING A MOVIE OVER HERE! Classic Emily. 

Several days after the whole Josh Duhamel incident I received a text from Emily that she had another celebrity sighting this time it was LL Cool J.  It read, took cash out of an ATM next to LL Cool J today. I think this makes my whole year!  I promptly asked if he had one pant leg up and one leg down. I need to know the details! She said no but he had all white on yellow sunglasses which i just find to be dangerous. I mean white? In NEW YORK CITY! I know I couldn't do it. 

These stories are good but none of them compare to the end all be all celebrity sighting she had in Austin back in October (I think)  in Texas of all places. She was in Austin for a work conference and staying at the four season but little did she know that she was going to see the biggest celebrity of all. Now again Emily sees celebrities all the time so I knew it had to be someone big when I heard her reaction on the phone that day.  My phone starts ringing and I see it's her and immediately greet her with warmth, "What's up slut muffin!" I am met with heavy breathing and lots of illegible talk. I drop the funny stuff and I ask her what's wrong and that's when she gets out the following; OH MY GOSH YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHO I JUST SAW IN THE ELEVATOR! I SHARED SPACE WITH HIM! I BREATHED THE SAME AIR AS HIM! I MIGHT BE PREGNANT HE HAS THAT MUCH SEX APPEAL! (Now keep in mind that was all said in the high girly voice we all get when we get excited about something and our words get strung together.) Meanwhile I'm yelling  WHO WHO WHO! Finally she tells me the name of Justin Timblerlake. I don't know about you but if I shared an elevator with him I don't know if I could control myself... well him and Christian Bale. They are both in my top five, but I digress. 

After all the hyperventilating I made her tell me all the details point by point because really its like a personal encounter within the pages of UsWeekly. She was getting into the elevator when she heard this guy's voice say hold the elevator please! Emily, ever the kind southern bell that she is, did just that and who just happened to turn the corner Mr. sexy back himself. She merely did the head nod to him and he did the same; they rode down in silence together where he hopped into a waiting SUV and she went to faint. She saw him again when she was walking outside her meeting room and he was coming outside the workout room and this time he head nodded first which she took to mean will you have my babies and she said yes I will. It's really a very lovely story. 

Finding The Balance

Obviously this was supposed to post on Thursday but as always I'm running behind schedule so just humor me and read this as if i posted it on the 5th. 

Today I turn 28. Today is the year I take the steps to change careers and change my life. It all sounds so dramatic when I type it out that way and I guess in a way it is. To put it in perspective I should give you a bit of history.

I never gave my parents any trouble, I did everything I was told. I wasn't Anthony Michael Hall in Breakfast Club or anything but I was basically a good kid. I think in high school I had one beer and I shared it with four other people. I know I'm a HUGE rebel. I wasn't a nerd or anything, but I went to private school, and that wasn't really the thing to do. When I went to college I wanted to major in fine arts but my parents encouraged me to major in business, never the one to argue or disappoint I tried to find the one major in business that seemed what I wanted which ended up being marketing. My GPA only ended up being as high as it was because of all the extra curricular classes that I ended up taking.  I had to take macro economics 3 times because I just didn't understand it. I think this should have been a sign. I graduated in 2002 and not really all that happy with the degree that I had chosen.  

Looking back on it I think my parents just wanted me to make sure I would have a job after college and a business degree ensured that to them. (Which to their credit it did, not one I was happy with but that is neither here nor there) Like I have said my parents are older and to them they are from the generation where they think a profession should be a doctor, a lawyer, an engineer, and there is nothing wrong with those vocations but for me who has all this creative energy inside it's like death.  

A couple of weeks ago I approached my parents and told them I was going back to school to learn graphic design and possibly web development. You would have thought I told them I was moving to Antarctica and joining a cult. THE REACTION!  My dad immediately started spouting out questions like can you even make money off this so called graphic design! Telling me, I just don't understand it.  He then told me I should go get my masters in FINANCE! Hello, do we not remember the economics fiasco of '01? Again my parents are older and when talking to them about these things I'm talking across many generation gaps and sometimes getting my point across is so frustrating. 

To be honest I think this also came as a big shock to my parents because the job I currently hold is a great job and financially I will be taking a big pay cut when I start all over but to me it's worth it. I think it's long over due but to be honest I'm scared too. I'm going back to school. I'm also a little bit embarrassed because I'm afraid these kids are going to know more then I do and I'm not going to know something and look like a dumb ass. And also by the time everything is going to be said and done I will be 29 possibly 30 going into an entry level position probably with people younger then me as my boss just like Chandler from Friends. Scary. 

This was a big step for me to tell my parents I'm going back to school. I know what you are thinking, but you are 28! Yes, I know.  All I can say is sometimes when you have people who depend on you and this responsibility that has been on your shoulders for so long, sometimes you get treated like a child for a long time and you don't even realize that you have turned into an adult. The three of us have been this unit for so long and have been functioning this way for so long that it's hard to break this mold.

This is the first step in finding that balance I spoke of before so I can take care of my own life and not feel like I'm drowning.  

I'm embracing this change with hesitation but with eagerness too because hopefully this time next year I'm going to start looking for jobs that I really want and for the first time time not doing what is expected of me. Freeing and scary at the time. 

  

Not going to happen today

First I want to say thank you for such wonderful comments on my last post. I was sincerely touched. I can't even begin to describe the feeling that came over me when I was reading them. Thank you. 

Second I know I said that I was going to tell you the steps I was taking to accomplish this balance I am trying to achieve, but A. I'm in Las Vegas. B. It's my birthday today. C. I'm sick. D. I'm talking really sick not hang over sick. Cold. Ear ache. I wand to saw off my nose from all the sinus pressure sick. Thus the post that I had started on the plane on the way over here and was in the process of editing and putting the finishing touches on will probably be posted tomorrow when I get home. As for now I'm going to climb into bed. I have to rest up because I'm going to see this show tonight! 

The Only Child Syndrome Continued

I have touched lightly on this subject once before but I'm going to go a little bit more in depth in today's post and talk about what happens in the later years of an only child. What happens when you are the only child and your parents get older and you are the only person who is there to take care of them? The responsibility rest solely on your shoulders and sometimes it's hard to just get through the day. I never talk about this to anyone except my very close friends. I feel like I'm complaining and I don't mean to. Even writing this is hard. 

My parents had me when they were older so most of their friend's children are ten years ahead of me. My mom was 34 about to turn 35 and my dad was 38 about to turn 39. Now it doesn't seem so odd, but back then 27 years ago, it was probably the equivalent of 45 or 50. So do the math and my parents are up there in age. Anyone who has parents who are starting to go through health issues knows it can be a trying time, hopefully you have a brother a sister, a husband or a wife to help you through it. When you are an only child and you aren't married yet, you have this sense of responsibility and suddenly you become the parent. 

This is what has happened to me. 

I can't tell you exactly when it happened, when the shift occurred, but I know it has.  All of sudden the phone calls that I get  have started out with "I need you to do ..." And there is no one else to do those things but me.  In the last two years my mother has had three surgeries and while she is fine now I wish I had had someone to talk to or to help me when she came home from the hospital. That was such a trying time for our relationship. Last year my father went into the hospital for a week. It was the first time I had ever seen him sick. I had no one to talk to about it and it scared me and thats when I really felt alone and for the first time in a long time I wished I had a brother or sister to lean on. 

I want to move away from Texas again and I am slowly taking the steps to do that (details to come on Thursday) but I feel guilty because again I'm the only child and who else will help them if they need it? Sometimes I feel like crying because I think what if something happens and I'm not there. I know I can't live in a world of what ifs but this is my reality. This is what I deal with every day. I feel bad as if I am complaining and I don't mean to. I mean they are my parents. They have done so much for me how can I complain? I mean, I owe them right? They paid for my college. They took care of me! They have literally given me the world how can I not help them in any way that I can? The only answer I can give you is sometimes I feel as if I am drowning. These emotions are real and raw. 

While I am slowly figuring this out I know there has to be others out there who feel the same way I do. Who sincerely love their parents and want the best for them but at the same time need a way to find a balance. I'm trying to find this balance.